i'm such an ugly person... inside out... yup... i'm selfish... when i see my good/close friends coversing with their other friends, i feel very angry.. jealous? must be lorx... i dont like to see my friends toking to his or her friends whom i dont noe... even if i noe them i oso dont like cos their friends not my good/close friends... so wat do you call this? possesive? is that the word? i dont noe.. it's just that i want them to be my own and i don want to share.. yea... cos i feel that once they start talking to their friends, i will lose mine too.. n trust mi, the friend will soon leave mi... so sometimes, i'm a sadist inside my heart... i don want my friends' attention to go elsewhere except for mi you noe... but.. despite being ugly inside out, must glamour myself... always smile and things will be fine even if there are not...
just watch this anime ova... called black rock shooter... dont understand a freaking thing from the beginning till the end... haha... except for the few seconds at the end... haha... got larx... i understand the normal world of the story but not the other one.. this girl just made a  new friend in junior high... they very quickly became the best of friends... as they went to the 2nd year, 'cause they we in different classes, the girl has her own friends n slowly her best friend is drifting away from her... and one day she disappear...
NO!!!!!!!!!!!! that's the most scariest thing that is going to happen... i don't want it to happen to me or my friends!!!!! i dont noe wat i toking liao... not in the rite state of mind i think... wait when had i been in the rite state of mind? i dont noe.. i think i'm veri not in 1 piece rite now... suddenly feel like this suddenly feel like that... had i know growing up is so torturing, .... can do nth about it.... the process of growing up is somethings that you cant stop... kns... haix... shall go play 02mania now... haha.. play game oso same... cannot get my mind of things... no wonder filled with darkness... haha.. previous blog oso... nth in the world seems rite... hmmm... so i got prob larx... haha!!!
sometimes... i oso dunno myself... a text message from someone will make me feel veri sad, fustrated, etc...  the emotions in it are really those big ones you noe.... but my vocab limited so i cant really describe it out... but seriuosly... sometimes it make feel like dying during that veri moment... i dunno why... but seriuosly... oh kami-sama wat is happening to mi... T.T but no worry to much... blog is blog... pen down i  mean type down all my tots and hope that i will just stay in this virtual world.. kkz....